Trick or Treat

Do you know what happens when you live in another country for two years?  

Your children who have only lived in said country become immune to their local germs.  Meaning, despite America being beautiful and pristine, the germs are still there and my kids have picked up one bug or another.  Stella and Tiger have both been varying degrees of sick for 20 days.  20.  I haven't had a good night sleep in 20 days.  20.  Last night I got four hours of sleep.  I am pretty grouchy.  Stella coughed all night and once she finally fell asleep Tiger woke up.  When I picked him up he threw up.  In the two seconds of pre-vomit time I had to think I decided that I was easier to clean up than the couch.  That is love, or pragmatism.  Either way it is gross.  So I found myself in the bathtub with Tiger at 5:30.

I am not one to believe antibiotics will fix anything because I realize this probably is a virus.  But its been 20 days and something needed to change.  Today we called the doctor and they prescribed something.  If nothing else maybe it will keep them from picking up a bacterial cold.  Who knows but we have got to get these kids at least sleeping.

Stella and Tiger are supposed to be having their marathon Halloween-ness this weekend but unless something drastic changes it looks like they will spend it on the couch coughing.  

My Lovely Lady Lumps

Before my innocent blog readers start reading too much I need to put a disclaimer here: TMI.  If you don't like hearing about body parts and functions stop reading.  Now.

And for the rest of the world that wants to hear all about my body please read on.

So this month is breast cancer awareness month.  All around us there are pink ribbons, people are still racing for the cure, and then a fellow FS Blog friend was just diagnosed with breast cancer.   So all around me I am hearing the message.  Touch your boobs, look for lumps, get a mammogram.

So lets rewind two weeks ago.  Two weeks ago I went on a Super Fantastik trip to NYC.  My son is 17 months and I will confess  that I still occasionally breast feed him (although I am shy to admit this because an American doctor in Manila yelled at me and told me I was socially unacceptable when I was doing the same thing with Stella at 17 month).  I have been meaning to wean him but I will confess, nursing occasionally is WAAAAAY easier than weaning.  They cry, beg, don't fall asleep, what is fun about weaning?  Other than idiot doctors yelling at me I haven't felt the urgency.

So I go to NYC and I am so rarely nursing I don't think I need a pump or anything.  And all was well.  Except that I DID need a pump and I was in excruciating pain by the time I got home on Sunday.  I guess little Tiger is a bigger eater than I thought.  So right when I get home Tiger is making up for his 36 hours milk free with vengeance.

And then it happens.  I start to really hurt.  REALLY hurt.  On the right, which of course I write off as clogged milk duct or something nursing related.  Until I start feeling around from where the pain comes from and low and behold I discover what feels like a raisin of pain, I have a lump.

Waiting and terrified at the doctors office.  

So yesterday I went to the doctor.  I showed her the lump.  She concurred it was there and wasted no time to get me to see a radiologist.

For 16 excruciating hours I was a mess.  Every cute thing my kids did, every cute thing Seth did, I just started tear up.

Logically I knew it was wrong to be so upset but there was something there, it hurt and I was scared.

Today at 8 am I called and got an appointment.  By 10:30 I was shirtless having my first mammogram.

Let me tell you folks, nothing sexy about the mammogram.  It is like making a hamburger patty out of your boob.  But not the end of the world either.  It was 6 minutes of  moderate discomfort, but really for any woman who has nursed it is nothing compared to that first latch.

After that I had a sonogram and the radiologist confirmed the lump was part of my breast and related to breastfeeding.  And so in my 16 hours of panic it has now ended.

Except it hasn't.  I am okay and I feel totally blessed but there are so many other amazing women just like me who aren't okay and so my heart goes out to them.  And so to the rest of you, get a mammogram, touch your boobs and get it checked out if you have even an inkling of suspicion that something is weird.

I Heart D.C.

Forgot how awesome autumn was. 

I love it here.  The weather is gorgeous.  The trees are changing color, boots are totally appropriate and make me look taller and skinnier, I get to buy new sweaters.  Life is good and I am loving it.

Me and Mini-Me

Seth is finishing up his quick Dutch course.  After only seven weeks of language training he managed to get a 2/2+ on his Dutch exam.  I am hoping that someday this will come in handy in say, The Netherlands or perhaps Suriname.  The point is I am really proud of him for doing so well in such a short amount of time. It is probably a good thing we aren't in the same language class because I would be insanely competitive and he would kinda cream me without even competing.  

Fall in A-town is Gorgeous

I SHOULD be learning French with him but there is no easy way to do it.  Even with alternating schedules the trade off would be so close that naps would be missed and one of us would be late to class every day.  So, I am going to do Rosetta Stone French and pray that the Belgians are forgiving and try to learn in Brussels as well.  I might sign up for the community college French 101 course.

Tiger and Stella at Botanical Gardens

The kids and I are LOVING Arlington, DC, and the United States in general.  Today we went to the Botanical Gardens.  They loved it.  I loved that I could drive into downtown D.C. in less than 15 minutes.  Now that it is fall there are actually parking spots on the National Mall.

Me and Stella at Botanical Gardens

And in a completely unrelated side note.  Netflix Instant Streaming has seriously changed my life.  I love it and I am re-watching Veronica Mars, which if you haven't watched it, it is awesome.

NYC, Super Fantastik and Some Sick Kids Keeping Me Up All Night

New York was awesome.  Me and a few girlfriends stayed with our friend Carol in her amazing loft apartment (which, by-the-way, used to be the SAME apartment that Tom Cruise lived in during his Risky Business days).  We stayed up late chatting and slept in (except for me, I was bright eyed by 8), ate a lot of AMAZING food, shopped, and walked about ten miles. (Does that count as part of my marathon training? I decide it did and my legs are still a little sore from New York.)

It wasn't hard to leave the kids.  Stella threw a colossal tantrum at Sbarros (yup, my departing meal was at Sbarros).  It really was not difficult to say good bye to the tantrums.  Seth was Wonder Dad and kissed me goodbye at the train station.  When I bought my ticket only business class was available and let me tell you, it was nice.  Really nice.  I watched my Ipod, caught up on the newspaper, magazines, and basically only had to worry about me while traveling.  The only hitch in this story is the young kid who sat next to me.  He had to be a freshman in college or something.  He looked a little buzzed on something or perhaps mere college stoner aura.  He fell asleep and woke up with a startle, and his arms went flailing and he smacked me straight on my boob.  Yup, it happened, it was awkward.  My response was, "Are you okay?"  I wish I had thought of something clever, but there it is.

The next day was whirlwind of awesomeness.  We ate at some amazing restaurants.  I shopped for the children and husband that I left behind.  We had a celebrity spotting (the guy who play Sal on Mad Men).  We got pedicures (for only 10x the price of Manila).  It was a really good time.

I came back home early the next morning while my friends all slept in.  I was greeted with some very excited kids.  They were coming down with the worst coughs of their life and Stella had what seemed to be a bruised or sprained arm.  But they were happy and alive and Seth seemed to do great.  

The past few days I have had kids coughing all night.  I have spent several nights holding one baby or the other up so they can sleep, which means I don't get to sleep.  I can always tell that I am not getting enough sleep when I wake up wanting to cry but I don't have anything to cry about.  If I get that feeling, a nap is needed.  Seth came home a little early from work yesterday and I was able to catch up from the five straight days of five hours or less of sleep.  

A Weekend for Me

This weekend I am doing something I have never done before.  Something that I dreamed of, something that I have looked forward to for years, something that I knew would happen but now that its here I am not quite so sure I am ready.  I am leaving the kids and Seth and going to NYC for the weekend with some girlfriends.

Truth be told, I am really not going to be gone long at all.  I leave Friday evening and come back Sunday morning.  But in mom world when you have a three year-old and a 17 month old, a weekend is dreamy.  In a world where going to the bathroom uninterrupted is an accomplishment, this is about as good as it gets.  

At first I thought I would pass but Seth was insistent that I go.  He really encouraged me to just finally buy that ticket and has not complained even for a second about the duties of solo parenting for the weekend (ok single moms out there don't roll your eyes we all know that the world has a much lower bar for dads and taking care of babies, and Seth has always exceeding all expectations).  I think he is even excited to have some pure Stella-Tiger time.

So I am off...

Training

I made a promise to myself when I left the Philippines that I would exercise more.  In Manila there was a gym in my building, a really nice gym, but I just hate gyms.  It feels artificial.  I feel like a hamster running on a wheel.  If it is my only way to exercise I will, but I won't like it. 

When I got to Arlington the Gold's Gym was less than a five minute walk.  I went in and it was nice.  Really nice.  They gave me a free week pass to try it out.  I didn't go once.  I took this as a sign that perhaps the gym is not the route for me.  (Also I have read WAY too many stories about Gold's Gym totally pulling one over on people who cancel.)

So, I have to reason with myself.  Am I just going to throw in the towel and go the way of Bon-Bons, Cheetos, and afternoon soaps at 31 or am I going to get it together and get in shape?  

I vow for the latter.  

And so...I am going to train for a race.  I would like to say marathon but even as I type that word I sound like a twelve year old boy going through puberty.  So, I will start with a half marathon.  

I am going to run and give myself an hour of alone time every day when Seth gets home (which on the "late" schedule is usually no later than five).  This is me publicly blogging about it to make myself do it.

Today was my first attempt.  I admit after fifteen minutes I was second guessing this decision but I made it.  Tomorrow will be better.

Hard Times

The world has been glowy since returning back to the U.S.  I have been in such a bliss that everything works, smells nice, feels nice that it has been very easy to just let the gloss of America overtake me.  Today the gloss was gone and I remembered no place is heaven. 

I took the kids to a nearby small park.  No one was there and they were having a good time.  Then a man comes towards us.  He looks as if he is from Africa Africa.  When he greets us I can tell from his accent he is from some place in Africa.  He is delighted by the kids and starts asking me about them.  Tiger thinks he looks friendly and picks up some leaves and passes them to the stranger.  Stella says hello and announces that she is still, as a matter of fact, three.

Through some small talk I learn he is from Gambia.  He came here ten years ago to go to school and has been out of work for some time.  He now mostly wanders around to fill his days.  He is out of work and keeps applying for jobs.  It hits me then.

He is homeless.

He didn't have the normal homeless tell tale signs.  The big bag with a blanket or a large back pack.  He had a briefcase and was dressed in a few layers of clothes but the missing piece was the crazy.  In the past all my homeless dealings were with addicts or people who had crazy eye.  This guy just didn't have that.  He was homeless, and he was normal (from my very short not professional assessment).  It sort of broke my heart.  It was a total example of the recession in the U.S. and how it has hit beyond the fringes of society.

I wanted to do something.  I wanted to give him a job or money or just tell him it will be okay, but I couldn't.  My little Stella is a pretty sensitive soul, she asked me on the way home why I was a "little bit sad."  I told her he didn't have a home or any money.  She thought for a while and then said, "Maybe you can give him my snack next time."

Ahh the wisdom of a three year old.  If only it were that easy. 

Jamestown Should Have Been Roanoke

For the three day weekend we decided to take a little break from D.C. and check out Williamsburg.

We packed the kids, our bags, a stroller, food, and everything else in our Mini-Cooper Clubman and decided to really try out the car. It was fine. Admittedly the roof rack was genius and I wouldn't get a small car without a roof rack. And we will be able to get here and back and on a major detour adventure (upcoming paragraphs shall explain) on one tank of gas.

We got to Williamsburg yesterday early afternoon. We ended up staying at the Wyndham which has furnished timeshare type condos. Because I wasn't organized enough to book in advance we got the late bird desperation special. Nice. The resort has a park, indoor/outdoor pool, free arcade, mini golf, and gym. You can stay at the resort and have a good time, which is key when you have to spend hours at a time while a family member naps.

After we arrived we decided to hold off on seeing Williamsburg until Seth's brother and sister-in-law could come and meet us. We decided we would see the smaller Jamestown first. We are on our merry way to Jamestown following a terribly confused i-phone when all of the sudden we are on a road to a ferry with no turning back. This is a car ferry. The type of ferry that takes you across a river and then you get in your car and drive away. So we are all for the adventure and go across the river thinking we will just turn around and take it straight back.

Small problem here, when we get off the line to go back to Williamsburg is about half a mile long.  It was like Disneyworld on the Fourth of July, without the fireworks, rides, or magic.  Miserable.

Seth and I made the executive decision to go all the way around to the nearest bridge about 40 minutes away and then 40 minutes back, which turned out to be 60 minutes because of an accident.  So...our ferry adventure, not so super awesome.

Luckily our kids are awesome.  They didn't complain too much and fortunately I didn't run out of crackers.  

Today after our Williamsburg tour we once again tried to see Jamestown, which was closed.  So Jamestown... you are dead to me.  I tried twice, I failed.  Never again.  

The Bitterness of Life or Pinenuts

I love love love being back in the U.S.  I STILL cannot get over the grocery store options.  I know, its been over two months I should be normal.  BUT...I am not.

One of my most favorite grocery stores is Trader Joe's.  They have so many wonderful snacks, fruits, and easy dinners.   It is almost a complete shopping experience and then you need something like hoison sauce or something really specific which warrants a second shopping trip and before you know it I have hit two grocery stores and somehow I cannot get out under a $100.

But back to Trader Joe's, I am basking in their wonderful ingredients, wonderful sauces, snacks, drinks, marinated meats.  Yum, yum, yum.  I got some pinenuts there about two weeks ago.  Pinenuts are EXPENSIVE but I needed them for several recipes.  So I pick up my eight dollar handful of pinenuts and go on my way.  I cook dinner and get my pinenut basalmic chicken going.  As I am cooking I put a few raw pinenuts in my mouth.

That night dessert tasted funny.  The next morning breakfast tasted like zinc and grapefruits.  The next evening at dinner  I was still tasting metal bitter awful taste.  After about three days I was convinced I was dying.  My mouth tasted really really bitter.  I thought I had somehow got the diabetes or was having major hormonal changes, even pregnancy crossed my mind.  In my panic I consulted none other than Dr. Google, a most trusted source of medical information.    Sure enough number four in my "bitter taste in mouth" search brought up pinenuts as a cause.

Turns out...the pinenuts from Trader Joes both raw and cooked are causing serious bitter awful taste in some people's mouths.  No one knows why.  For me it lasted seven days.  For others it lasts two weeks.  Some people have gone to great lengths of medical testing thinking they are dying.

So I go back to Trader Joe's and inform the store of this pinenut problem.  They are pretty clueless.  Then I call the Trader Joe's corporate office.  Their customer service was FANTASTIC.  I shed a little tear for my country and their complete ability to understand customer's needs.  Angie, my TJ's customer service person listened, empathized, told me of TJ's search to find the cause and how told me how they are working with the FDA to figure out what is going on (no one knows why, its not dangerous but it is definitely a problem for some people).  Trader Joe's is working on some sort of sticker warning system.

Two days later I get a personalized note, a check for $8, and a gift card for $15.  Yay!  I still think seven days of bitter mouth is worth more than that but I wasn't expecting anything so I was very happy.

In a Moment

Tonight we put the kids to bed and were in our room having some quiet time when we heard a CRASH and then CRASH followed by a quick siren and lights.

At first I thought it was a police chase that crashed in our front yard.  In the end it turned out to be a drunk driver that hit several parked cars before hitting two in front of my house and ending his drunk driving career.

Stella woke up.  Mayhem in our quiet gossipy neighborhood.

It freaked me out.  It was 9:00 at night but all the time we are outside.  Every day and it just made me realize how very quickly your life can change in a situation like that.

I hugged my babies a little harder that night.

Quitting Cable

Anywhere you go there is a hierarchy of bottom dwelling service providers that you have to put up with.  This is my list, the worst offenders first:


Tow Truck People (the ones who seek out to tow not the ones you call when you have a flat)
Cable Companies
Cell Phone Companies
Insurance Claims Department

When we were departing post we canceled our cable, like good diplomatic families should, and returned our cable box.  We never got our $25 deposit back, which irked me, but I let that go since I was dealing with about 50 trillion other problems much bigger than Sky Cable.

Yet, here we are, almost two months later and they still are billing us.  And so it begins again.  I call THE PHILIPPINES and cancel, they apologize, I get another bill.  I email, they don't reply.  We call again.

Rewind to about two years ago.  We just got to Manila we were starting over.  Comcast Cable sends me a bill.  Same story.

My gut tells me that this sort of business practice is not just an accident.  I think the cable companies probably think it is worth putting us through the hassle if they can get one or two more months out of those that are unaware and just pay or just put up a white flag to avoid confrontation.

It exhausts me and should be punishable.

As a protest to the cable companies, I refuse to buy it.  It is a lot of wasted money ($130 a month).  Instead we watch our shows on Hulu (I bought a cord that takes my laptop to the tv), and Netflix streaming is a dream.  And as a side note did you know in the U.S. they have a show called Hoarders?  It is horrifying that such a show exists but somehow I can't turn it off.  God bless America and the over abundance of viewing options.  And cable TV if you are afraid that people are leaving you for other viewing options customized to their wants, you should be.  We are one of the millions that is just fed up with cable.

We have loved, loved, loved living in Arlington.  Fall is here is full force.  The leaves are starting to change and I had to buy jackets for the kids.  I love fall weather.

We went to the DC LDS Temple over the weekend.  It always reminds me of the Emerald City in the Wizard of Oz.  Stella said it was a castle.